Wednesday, 9 June 2010

Venus in 3D: Kelly Brook in Piranha 3D

Kelly for Ultimo this week

No apologies for yet another Kelly Brook post (we know that Agent DVD enjoys them)! The girl's publicity machine is in overdrive at present with her launching a new range of underwear for Ultimo yesterday.

Kelly demonstrates her 0.70 waist/hip ratio; confirming her definitive hourglass measurements

The interesting news is that she has a new film out this summer: Piranha 3-D. Really, at last someone has fathomed the real benefit of 3D cinema. Kelly in 3D. Excellent!

The not at all deriviative poster

The plot is as follows: "After a sudden underwater tremor sets free scores of the prehistoric man-eating fish, an unlikely group of strangers must band together to stop themselves from becoming fish food for the areas new razor-toothed residents." Well, piranhas aren't really prehsitoric now, are they? They do actually live in the rivers of South America. It's like describing cats as prehistoric because they existed in the ice age...

You know what you are in for when one of the characters is called "wet t-shirt victim" played by a lady called Bria Roberts whose previous three roles were as "Thorean's Victim", "Dancer" and "Party Girl". It makes Kelly's film resume look like Meryl Streep's by comparison.

Kelly performs a 3D camera alignment test on set

The film also stars Dina Meyer, who was very good in Starship Troopers but never made the big time, although she does a lot of TV. The real shock is to see how far Christopher Lloyd (Back to the Future) and Richard Dreyfuss (Jaws, Close Encounters) have fallen.

On set photos of Kelly show that her outfit was designed with 3D in mind. Clearly, Kelly has no experience of boats, however, given her footwear here.

The other young lady playing around with Kelly is up and coming porn star Riley Steele (can't you just tell from her name?) which gives some indication of the class of the film.

Riley just can't resist them

No doubt we will be able to pick this epic up on DVD for £3 or so shortly after it's released!

The ability to climb a yacht ladder in five inch stilettos is only gained after much long, hard practice

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